Big Fat Slob

Yeah, you read that right...I'm a big fat slob. I hate myself sometimes for letting myself get this way. Why do we let ourselves go after we get married and have kids? Do we feel like we just don't matter anymore, or is there something else to it? Maybe there is something deeper involved that I just don't know about, but I've been letting myself go for the last 7 years now, and it's got me to the point where I'm nothing more than a big fat slob.*

* - Okay, I'll admit that I could be in much worse shape. Seeing shows on tv like "The Biggest Loser" make me feel a little better about myself, but it's still no excuse for me to be this big fat slob version of my former self.

Well dammit, I'm tired of being a big fat slob. I'm tired of being ashamed of how I look and feel now as opposed to 7 years ago. It's time for a change. It's time for the dreaded D word. It's time to actually stick to my guns, get off my lazy ass, and do what I've gotta do to lose weight. I'm sick of being unhealthy.

So, I'm going on a diet. Not the kind of diet where I don't eat anything at all, or some fad diet that everyone else is doing because Oprah, or Dr. Oz, or Dr. Phil, or any other whacko who has a tv show says to do; but the kind of diet that I can deal with and lose weight at the same time. I'm making some sacrifices (like chocolate, and ice cream...oh how I'm gonna miss ice cream), and cutting back on things that I consume too much of (soda and beer, for example).

Not only am I cutting back on the things that I eat/drink too much of, but I'm replacing them with things that I don't eat nearly enough. I'm taking my own advice that I usually give to the other big fat slobs I see every day, and I'm going to mix in a salad or two. (I'm curious as to how long I can do this, because as a general rule I hate salads. I've never understood the point of eating lettuce like I were a baby rabbit or something.)

I'm sure I'll have plenty to gripe about now that I'm doing this. (Of course, having something to gripe about and actually taking the time to gripe about it are two totally different things, just so you know.) Stay tuned for updates as this diet progresses. If I do happen to lose weight, I'll be sure to post pictures of myself to piss you off/make you jealous/make you want me/whatever the case might be. Or, maybe I won't.

You'll just have to tune in to find out.